A product to keep your breath "coffee fresh"

So, we were on our way to work last week when a nice young lad in front of our office building asked us if we would like some coffee. We’re thinking, “What the …” Then he handed us a sample with a stick of gum in it, yes, a stick of gum. He thought he’d outsmarted us into taking one of the worst ideas of the world and holding it in the palm of our hand.

The sample says that this gum comes from Wrigley’s, a company which has been quite busy over the last 114 years. They’ve really come up with some amazing stuff, most notably Juicy Fruit pellets, but there is no mention of coffee gum on their website. On the Wrigley’s China site (English version) we can’t find mention of this gum listed among their products, either. What gives? Oh, wait. This is China -- just because it says "Wrigley's" doesn't make it Wrigley's. The most important issue, however, is this: Who the hell wants to try to sell coffee-flavored gum in the first place? Don't you chew gum to get rid of "coffee breath"?

Does it even sell? According to a (really old) taste test, "The Coffee Gum was also both tested against Wrigley's Doublemint and the Doublemint was overwhelmingly preferred as a confection, as expected" -- and that version of coffee gum actually had caffeine. But, in the home of Green Tea gum, anything is possible. And you can always follow up your coffee gum with a piece of this gum.

As some brands promote “a good, clean feeling, no matter what", this one seems to be going for something more like, “why drink when you can chew.” Eww.

Coffee gum, available from both “Wrigley's” and Lotte, can be found at convenience stores throughout the city.