Honey, I'm always tired

You never know about reports issued on April 1, but we have good reason to believe that a recent Chinese report about the lack of sex that middle-aged Chinese couples have might be true. According to that report, issued by some population studies center, over 30% of middle-aged couples have, mostly due to stress and responsibility and busyness, given up their sex lives (放弃性生活), while 41% still maintain some kind of regular sex life. By contrast, only 25% of couples under 30 surveyed had given up on their sex lives. How the frequency of fucking is distributed for the remaining 75% was not included in the news article.

We don't believe that anyone really gives up on sex, as several notable Catholic priests have proven over the years, but nonetheless, there must be some cut-off number—once a month? Once a year?

The survey was conducted by this center and involved over ten Chinese cities, including Beijing, Chongqing, Guangzhou—conspicuously omitting (just in the news report?) Shanghai, maybe because everyone here spends half their time boning (we know we do), which would skew the results.

And of course, the results need to be skewed because the survey was funded in part by Eli Lilly, the pharmaceutical company from Indianapolis, Indiana, one of whose products is Cialis, which is a product for erectile dysfunction and supposedly has a longer half-life than Viagra, which is great if you want to go to work in the morning with a woody.

Yes, we know—sexual problems between couples are not limited to erectile dysfunction—but the survey did include questions relating to why people were not doing it, and one of the reasons was issues related to the sex itself, a subset of which must be related to erectile dysfunction.

Speaking of woodies, this post made us remember that famous Woody Allen quote: "Don't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love." Giving up on sex with your spouse is one thing, losing the will altogether is another.

Photo from swherdman's Flickr page.