Olympic Security English: "Shut up so we can finish our search"

Sweet post!

Has anyone ever gotten a letter from a waitress?

It would make more sense for them to learn it in Arabic.

the old "its the maid" trick, it's the oldest trick in the book...yes, THIS book.

By the way, does this mean that if I can't make indian pan cake, I shouldn't expect any hassle from the police?

Great now I'm giggling at work. How inconvienent!

Not only useful for English, but also rife with classic, and certainly real, tactical maneuvers, such as the falsetto voice maid impersonation move:

P: "This is the waitress [sic]"

...

F: "Why did you men break in?"

This selfsame trick was used to gain access to Saddam's spider-hole.

When I read these I feel like I'm reading the subtitles to a hong kong martial arts flick...

What lousy luck!