So admittedly we’re not an expert in India-China relations, but last we checked, they weren’t exactly sour. Sure, we’re not best buddy-buds with our neighbors to the South, but we seem to back each other up a lot on certain issues (like climate change).
According to one Indian analyst though, we’re poised to attack them by 2012. Bharat Verma, editor of the Indian Defense Review, told the Indian Economic Times that “there are multiple reasons for a desperate Beijing to teach India the final lesson, thereby ensuring Chinese supremacy in Asia in this century.”
He listed a couple of points that outlined why we would ever engage in such a useless, costly, and geopolitically upsetting move:
- Pakistan is not doing well in its fight against India, and this matters to us because China “controls” Pakistan.
- India is totally allying with the US and the West, and China’s scared about that because “the alliance has the potential to create a technologically superior counterpoise.”
- There is unprecedented internal social unrest thanks to the economic slowdown and China will deal with it by diverting troops away from where the social unrest is happening and into a country it has yet to find beef with.
Okay, so maybe you’re getting that we think Bharat’s a little bonkers (we’re not the only ones). Really though, a war with India seems like the last thing China would want at this stage, especially since it seems more content to temper relations by becoming economically necessary to the country its rivaling. Besides, (as Verma admits) India would be pretty screwed if a war really happened.
But then again, we restate that we are not International Relations experts and who knows – maybe China will do an about face on their stance on global aggression, risking long-term damage to their economy as a way to try and distract from internal strife. Or maybe Hu Jintao will watch Chadni Chowk to China, get annoyed by how stupid a movie it is, and decide India deserves to be punished for it.
Hey, it seems just as possible. It was a pretty stupid movie. Come on, those yellow Kill Bill outfits? Really? That part took place in Japan, assholes.