The Paint The Town Red Communist Party Party held at Not Me on Friday night was a political and economic success, featuring the Shanghaiist Propaganda Dissemination Committee in attendance, celebrating the Party’s 90th Anniversary together with Shanghai’s most dedicated Party-loving
alcoholics Vanguard Pioneers, in what was a cathartic face-saving success that testified to the vitality and currency the Party still retains amongst the fenqing, eliminating any whisker of doubt regarding the Party’s ability to continue onward in its magnanimous rule, New York Times dissident op-ed ninny dogs be damned!
Revelers and revolutionary thinkers discussed the Two Whatevers (两个凡是) and the Three Accompaniments (三陪) while being treated to an assortment of Western Contemporary Dance Anthems, after the Party sent directives to the Shanghaiist work unit to let the Foreign Musics Bloom to demonstrate the Party’s tolerance for
Immoral International Cultures.
The Not Me beverage dispensary was also host to the National Day gathering of our fellow Canadian brothers in socialism on Friday night. Their red clothing was coordinated with the Party’s own color scheme, and many admiring looks were directed towards the Canadian maple leaf logo used to distinguish themselves from American military antagonists throughout the evening.
The co-use of the carousing space with our socialist brothers was a demonstration of the Party’s ethic of civilized sharing, while also respecting the other contingent’s sovereign carousing space, with each cohort engaging in co-mingling while also upholding the policy of mutual non-interference.
We would like to extend our heartfelt gratitude to the correct-thinking attendees of our Anniversary gathering, and would also like to sound a warning to the politically-suspect individuals who neglected to participate. It is advised that non-attendees vow to be more diligent in taking part in future Anniversaries, in order to ensure their good standing for the next inspection survey. Long live the Party!