By Horace Lu
The soccer team of an elementary school in Beijing was demolished by its Russian counterpart in a friendly match 0:15, according to Beijing Times journalist Zhang Bin. Zhang said over Sina Weibo yesterday:
Totally appalled! Today, an elementary school in Beijing had a soccer friendly with a Russian elementary school. The match was originally scheduled to be 40 minutes. The result was 0-15. Chinese students collapsed totally! Our students were older and taller, but they not only had no strategy, they were also afraid of bodily contact. By the time the first half had ended, they were already out of stamina. As the Chinese headmaster said helplessly, “We don’t have parallel bars or box horses any more. We haven’t even had one student’s foot hurt by a shot put anymore.”
Zhang later added that the Russians had wanted the match to be longer, but the Chinese headmaster had the match shortened because he knew that none of his kids had the stamina. The Chinese students eventually proved to be no match for their Russian counterparts, who were good in both attacking and defending.
The headmaster later joked self-deprecatingly that maybe the school should demolish all buildings and only have one-storey bungalows, so that no student gets hurt while walking up- and downstairs. Parents these days get angry when their kids suffer the slightest injuries, he said, and the consequences are serious if they complain.
Well there really is a very easy way out of all this humiliation. Just invite the Russian school back for a table tennis match next.