By Benjamin Cost
Rumor has it that the Confucius Temple in Rehe will house a hotel and restaurant in the near future!
The shrine, one of the Hebei province’s grandest Confucius temples, is already witnessing construction on its eastern and western grounds, and the restaurant and hotel are geared to open sometime in May 2012.
What better way to celebrate the life of a man who advocated piety towards the deceased than to plant two 21st century tourist attractions smack-dab in the middle of one of his chief commemorative sites?
The Confucius temple has experienced its fair share of momentous events: from its completion in 1779 (which Emperor Qianlong witnessed), to its demise at the hands of the Maoist regime in the 1960s, to its 2007 restoration and subsequent reopening this past summer.
Not to mention, during the temple’s golden era in the Qing Dynasty, the site allegedly was where young scholars would prep for the Imperial Exams and also served as a ceremonial area for sacrifices (presumably offering quick reprieve for the students who failed their exams).
Yet even a sacrificial alter seems less sacrilegious than the planned “sacrifices” to the god of Capitalism. However, perhaps it is a necessary evil, as the proceeds will directly benefit the Confucius temple’s currently floundering economy while also helping it draw visitors, one of the site’s core struggles.
When the hotel and restaurant finally open their doors to the public, we can only imagine what the notices on the lobby placards may read:
- Confucius says no matter what one’s doorknob sign read, expect a knocking for housekeeping will pay no heed.
- Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves. (and if your friends leave trash in the presidential suite, then dig two more, because that’s a dick move)
- It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop (apply this to the minibar concessions and watching pay-per-view)
- Confucius says pee in the pool should be as scarce as bamboo on a winter’s mountain peak