Brangelina, a monster which stalks the Hollywood A-list, its endless hunger for young flesh only sated by impoverished, orphan children, has set its eyes on China, a yet untapped resource of potentially adoptable younglings.
The Sun reports:
BRAD PITT and ANGELINA JOLIE have developed a sudden interest in China and are getting stuck in to learning Mandarin.
The lingo could come in handy as pals say Angie wants to adopt yet another child and this time it could come from China.
Brangelina have also enrolled their six kids for classes in the language – as well as Angie’s dad JOHN VOIGHT, so he can help with the homework.
The beast, which possesses the ability to break into multiple forms, like the vampyr of yore, has made previous forays into China. In January, the one known as BRAD PITT, joined Weibo, presumably in an attempt to glean useful information from his followers about the country’s prime orphan harvesting locales.
“It is the truth. Yup, I’m coming…” He said, putting fear into the hearts of China’s street kids.