A Chinese dating book, published in 1989 has all of a sudden become one of the most talked-about topics on the internet. On the first page, it reads, “This book will save you from learning everything the hard way.” A lofty claim, many would say. And China’s answer to The Game it is not, but it’s worth a read, even if just for a laugh.
Here are five cringeworthy chat-up lines the book recommends in order to greatly increase one’s chances of procuring a girl’s telephone number. These lines also come complete with stage directions.
1) Do you have aspirin?
Remember to make out as if you are in pain, only then will you garner sympathy from her. Women often carry this kind of medicine on them, due to their natural biological needs.
2) We have both been fooled!
If the girl has been stood up or if her friends are late to meet her, why not try acting as if you have been struck by the same fate?
It may not be the most impressive line, but maybe the girl will appreciate your directness.
4) Excuse me, please can you help me check if my tie is correctly done? I didn’t have enough time to look in the mirror, and I have to attend a very important meeting soon. Sorry, thanks so much for your help…
In a lift. Don’t forget to look very rushed and stressed.
5) This book has such good content.
In a book store.
Other pearls of wisdom include the following: “Women are fundamentally lonely and need men to sweep away the loneliness in their hearts.”
Some of the chapter titles in the book:
- It’s ok if you look average
- All women want love
- The best part about a beautiful woman dating an ugly man
- Tell her, “I only love you”
The book also talks about sex, and suggests that innuendo is the best way to “ignite a girl’s desire”.
“Girls like to hear innuendos and suggestive speech. But you have to keep it simple – too over the top and it’ll sound too clumsy and maybe even offensive. Some girls look mean, and may say something back to you if you say something frivolous. But if you think they are angry, then think again.”
[Image credit: @veryrock // Via: Weibo]