• ABOUT
  • ADVERTISE
  • SUPPORT
  • CONTACT
  • WORK
Saturday, April 17, 2021
Shanghaiist
8 °c
Shanghai
7 ° Sat
6 ° Sun
6 ° Mon
5 ° Tue
5 ° Wed
9 ° Thu
  • NEWS

    The “world’s tallest swing” is now open in Chongqing and it looks absolutely terrifying

    Kid falls from second story while imitating Kobe Bryant’s fadeaway

    Guy wearing police uniform for “safety” pulled over by highway cops

    Dalian to test 190,000 residents after 3 new confirmed cases are reported

    One-legged Chinese baller inspires others with his hard work and three-point shot

    Chinese courier company caught using mannequins as security inspectors

    China opens another world’s longest glass-bottomed bridge in Guangdong province

    3-year-old girl and her grandma beaten with shovel in horrific “revenge” attack

    Workers spotted burning documents as US orders China to close its Houston consulate

    LOOK: Massive landslide blocks river in Hubei province

    IKEA to open new downtown location in Shanghai this week

    Hunan bus drivers block road to pass bag of betel nuts across opposite lanes

    Jilin driver delayed by 20 minutes by wild Siberian tiger relaxing on the road

    6-year-old boy drowns to death during first swimming lesson at public pool

    Neighbor smoothly catches toddler falling from 5th floor

    Dude spotted chillaxing on self-made raft on river in Chongqing during flood season

    Shanghai dude gets part of ear bitten off while stopping drunk guy from assaulting woman

    Woman mysteriously disappears from home in Hangzhou, leaving behind no trace

    Two women get stuck in elevator at home for 4 days, drink their own urine to stay alive

    Urumqi goes on lockdown as fears rise of a new coronavirus outbreak in Xinjiang

  • L!FE
  • FOOD
  • GALLERY
  • VIDEO

    WATCH: Colorized footage of life in Beijing a century ago

    Hunan high school turns gym into cafeteria to keep students separated

    Kung fu school reopens teaching students how to swing bricks from their balls

    Dancing aunties and uncles return to Wuhan sidewalks

    Xi Jinping actually made a joke!

    Shanghai dad builds Death Stranding like safety pod to protect baby from coronavirus

    Tag along on food tour of Lanzhou, the hometown of hand-pulled noodles

    Man smashes bus window, jumps out after being stuck in traffic for 20 minutes

    Scooter driver somehow survives being squashed by massive panes of glass

    How students at a Xuzhou primary school have taken jump rope to the next level

    How this Chinese martial arts master “jumps on water”

    Bringing your date to your studio apartment of great shame

    Male designer loses 25 kg, goes viral modeling women’s clothing

    Take a look inside Taiwan’s “most luxurious university dormitories”

    Racers take the stairs in 119-floor vertical marathon up the Shanghai Tower

    Meet China’s captivating “roly-poly girl” who defies gravity with a smile

    Awful Chinese propaganda rappers take on Hong Kong protests, sample Trump

    Trying the food at a Chinese Muslim wedding in Kaifeng

    What it’s like visiting home after living in China

    Watch this Chinese teen jump rope 228 times in just 30 seconds

  • TICKETS
    • FAQ
  • ★ BE A PATRON
    • ★ DONATE
No Result
View All Result
Shanghaiist
No Result
View All Result
Shanghaiist
No Result
View All Result

Why traditional one-night stands are dying out in one Sichuan ethnic group

by Reuters
May 5, 2018
in News

zhaba3.jpg
ZHABA, CHINA (AFP) – Nimble after years of practice, Trinley Norbu is used to hoisting himself three stories up the side of a stone house and through the window for a one-night stand in his southwest China community.
While other young men squire their love interests to dinner or a movie, Trinley Norbu has honed his climbing skills, long the key to successful courtship for men in the small matrilineal Zhaba ethnic group of Sichuan province.
The Zhaba eschew monogamous relationships for traditional “walking marriages” — so-called since men typically walk to their rendezvous before slipping through their lover’s window.
But the 37-year-old truck driver and others in the remote area on the edge of the Tibetan plateau lament that the tradition is waning, as women increasingly want a bit more commitment from a man.
The arrival of the internet, smartphones, livestreaming and popular Korean TV shows, along with improved transportation and education opportunities beyond the valley, have exposed the once isolated Zhaba to other lifestyles.
“Now the women especially have begun to want the same things as outsiders — fixed marriages, and financial assets such as a house or car,” he said.
But an even more dramatic challenge looms on the horizon: one of the world’s tallest dams will soon flood the valley, forcing villagers to scatter as they relocate from ancestral homes.
“It’s heartbreaking. They’ve turned our area upside down, and we don’t have any say in it,” said Trinley Norbu, who is temporarily employed by the construction site.
His friend Khando Tsering stared up at the towering, unfinished support pillars of a highway that will soon halve travel times to the nearest city — and bring tourism to the once-pristine enclave.
“The economy will develop and people’s character will degenerate. Everything will be about money, and our local traditions will disappear,” he predicted.
“That’s just how things work in this era.”

‘People as possessions’

Walking marriages began disappearing in the 1980s as the government imposed strict family planning measures.
The new policy meant heavy fines for babies born without legal fathers, forcing Zhaba people to obtain government marriage certificates and identify — on paper at least — a single partner as a spouse.
That process introduced the idea of “people as possessions” and caused a rise in notions of jealousy, an emotion once rarely overtly expressed, according to a paper by Qinghai Normal University anthropologist Feng Min.
Since then, walking marriage has become less and less common. Feng’s 2004 survey of 232 households found that only 49% of Zhaba households still practiced the tradition.
zhaba.jpg
Children in such families are raised by their mother and her siblings in large, six-story communal houses of yellowed stone on the lush green hillsides, with cavernous rooms too large for much light to penetrate.
Fathers might provide some financial support, but live with their mother.
“I don’t have a husband. Their father lives somewhere else,” said 60-year-old matriarch Dolma Lhamo after a breakfast of yak butter tea and tsampa, roasted flour eaten by hand, as she led two daughters out to tend the family potato field.
Shopkeeper Pema Bazhu used to share a home with her mother, grandmother, sisters and uncles, but she recently chose to move out and live separately with her husband and two year-old son.
“It’s much more common now to see families living on their own as a unit,” she said. “It’s more convenient, and it’s better for raising children.”

‘If she’s willing’

Tsultrim Paldzone, 30, explained that when he and his friends were younger, they would snag tokens from girls they fancied on festival or market days, calling cards to be returned that evening during a nocturnal visit to her home.
“If she’s willing, then she’ll run just a little bit less fast. If she’s really not willing, you won’t grab that token no matter how hard you try to steal it,” he laughed.
Cars were uncommon then. He had once walked over 10 kilometers (six miles) to reach one lover’s home, starting before sunset and arriving after midnight.
Now no one in the small community – just some 13,624 people according to the latest 2010 census – lives more than a half hour’s motorbike trip away.
zhaba2.jpg
Trysts are arranged ahead of time on the popular cellphone messaging app WeChat, and the coy game of token-grabbing has mostly disappeared.
“There’s no challenge anymore; it’s definitely not as fun as before,” the painter of temple frescos lamented.
Government bureaucracy, too, is making it more difficult for the Zhaba’s walking marriages.
Children born to parents without marriage certificates are not allowed “hukou,” all-important registration documents that allow them to access health care and schooling.
Today, even those who wish to continue with walking marriage resort to paying unmarried acquaintances or strangers to apply for the certificate with them, said Tsultrim Paldzone.
“The government won’t let you just do as you please.”
(Becky Davis/AFP)
[Images via Johannes Eisele/AFP]

At this matchmaking festival celebrated by Taiwan's Amis tribe, women take their pick of eligible bachelors https://t.co/kGmSN1ZynE pic.twitter.com/b0SOO2GH4e

— Shanghaiist.com (@shanghaiist) August 22, 2017


qixi-banner.jpg

events-banner.jpg


Shanghaiist-Travel.jpg

everyday-chinese-banner.jpg

Follow Shanghaiist on WeChat

qrcode-shanghaiist.jpg

Share this:

  • Pocket
  • Telegram
  • Print
Shanghaiist

© 2005-2018 Shanghaiist - China in bite-sized portions!

Navigate Site

  • About
  • Advertise
  • Be a Patron
  • Join the Community
  • List Your Event
  • Be a Venue Partner
  • Submit a Gallery
  • Work with us
  • Privacy & Terms
  • Contact

Follow Us

No Result
View All Result
  • NEWS
  • L!FE
  • FOOD
  • GALLERY
  • VIDEO
  • TICKETS
    • FAQ
  • ★ BE A PATRON
    • ★ DONATE

© 2005-2018 Shanghaiist - China in bite-sized portions!